Breastimonial: Swimsuit shopping with BIG Boobs
I love my big breasts but there are a few occasions when I do have small breast envy. Ya that’s a thing. We always want what we don’t have, especially when it’s time to buy a new bikini. Don’t get me wrong, I love the way my boobs look in a bathing suit, especially a classic string bikini which I think is the sexiest thing a woman can wear. Unfortunately while I may love an itsy bitsy teeny weeny string bikini my neck does not. Imagine trying to carry two four pound weights tied to a thin piece of string wrapped around your neck. Doesn’t sound like much fun does it?
Shopping for swimsuits when you’re big breasted is a nightmare. The tops are never the right size or have enough support. Even my beloved triangle tops rarely have enough fabric to actually cradle my boobs properly. I dream of diving into in a pool and not coming out of the water topless. I know that’s the opposite of what you probably dream about. Don’t even get me started on the amount of times I’ve gone surfing and stood up on my board in front of a crowded beach only to realize that my top didn’t stand up with me.
What women really need are swimsuit shops that label their suits by category and sell all pieces separately because while I may have some beautiful curvaceous breasts I have the ass and hips of a twelve year old boy, so I can’t buy tops and bottoms together.
If I owned a bathing suit shop here’s how I would arrange things.
All tops and bottoms sold separately and tops labeled by bra size. I’ve tried on XXL triangle tops that didn’t even cover my nipples. A bikini label can be very misleading.
There would be a mix of patterns and solid colors so that mixing and matching different bottoms to different tops can be easy. I’m always looking for a versatile bottom that goes with a lot of different tops, that’s what he said!
Suits arranged by functionality: Meaning all suits that have more support for those of us who like to play beach volleyball without having a nipple slip out or being in extreme pain every time we jump up for a spike should be put into a sporting category. If they can do it for dog shows they can do it for bathing suits.
Suits that are barely there for those times when all you want to do is expose as much skin as possible while laying by the pool and sipping margaritas, can be in the tanning section.
One pieces for those competition swimmers out there who like to feel as sleek as a dolphin while slicing through the water.
And an all purpose section where suits expose as much skin as possible while still supporting your breasts in a sexy way and preventing nipple exposure (which really for me, would be the holy grail of swimsuits.) Sort of like a luxury swimsuit SUV.
Shopping for bikinis doesn’t have to be a nightmare, it should be fun. If you’re buying a bathing suit it means you must be about to do something involving fun, sun and water. What’s better than that?
What about you? Do you have a story of seeing this happen to you or someone you know? Share in the comments!
